kitbogas:

im russian

wiitangclan:

wiitangclan:

the best way to a girls heart is punching through the ribcage 

apparently this is illegal but dont let it stop you

chessys:

its just me n u bud

pretty-anarchist:

america: “yo watch how badly we can fuck up our country”

britain: “*cracks knuckles*”

brigwife:

kidouyuuto:

how did they learn to translate languages into other languages how did they know which words meant what HOW DID TH

English Person: *Points at an apple* Apple

French Person: Non c’est une fucking pomme 

*800 years of war*

lukerawme:

me: i’m stressed

someone: don’t be stressed

me: 

gotitforcheap:

my clone: wow I feel anxious

me: haha this guy gets it 

theatreaficionado:

damethompson:

damethompson:

Emma Thompson probably has an easy answer to all your existential questions.

Let’s not forget that one year ago Emma Thompson threw a pair of Louboutins on stage with a martini in hand…

NEVER FORGET

today-ifuckedup:

My pasta was too hot to eat so I decided to blow on it. Then I saw my can of compressed air sitting on my desk. I now have pasta all over myself, the floor, and the walls. I am not a smart man.

exhalist:

Going from high school to university like:

azalea-dylan:

johnrulestheworld:

hickeys are beautiful because they are the only time a bruise results from love and affection rather than harm

false i have a bruise that resulted from my deep love and affection for spaghettios and my inability to hold onto the can of spaghettios

foxgrl:

miruinnuial:

foxgrl:

I wish none of you were sad

I wish there was peace and justice and wealth and happiness and good people around all of the planet

try and one up me again bitch

birdonahotdog:

this is one of my favorite tweets of all time